Will & Surrender

Mother-perfect blend of will and surrender

Picture: Mother–A perfect blend of will and surrender (circa 1967)

Mother spoke powerfully about two seemingly opposite means of dealing with life’s problems. One is to use your God-tuned will, as she effectively did, in order to overcome tremendous obstacles, and the second is to surrender to God’s will at all times. So which do you do, fight or surrender?

Confusion comes from the word surrender. Many associate surrender with defeat, this is not what is intended when it comes to your sadhana, your spiritual practice. Surrender to God means you are first attuning your mind to God’s Mind; if there is a difference between your will and God’s, then you go with what God is directing you to do rather than your own inclination.

For instance, lower impulses make you feel that your mind is being drawn away from God. You know the limiting, tortured feelings that come from following these desires. Like a honey trap you are drawn by the cloying sweet sensations inside the trap, but once you enter in you are encaged. God-experience frees you from the trap, but you must clearly choose God over sweet deadly promises.

You may have fear concerning some experience coming your way. Fear disconnects you from God, it builds fear upon fear and will dominate your life; it makes you think of the worst scenarios and you feel helplessly caught. The fact that you are made in the likeness and image of pure transcendent God-consciousness is completely obliterated by the fog of fear.

Surrender to God means you use your powerful will to focus your mind upon God, not the images of fear. You affirm that God is at the core of your being; it is His Light, courage, strength, mirthful-joy and love that act as angel’s wings to lift you above the clouds of doubt and enclosing fear. You concentrate on the truth that God knows whether a sparrow falls, and He has counted the hairs on your head (Matt. 10; 29-30); in other words there is not a single thing that occurs in this wide world that is beyond the knowledge and care of its Creator.

Currently I am waiting to hear back on the results of the biopsy taken on Thursday. In the waiting I have a choice on what to focus my mind; the possibility of tumor growth, or upon God. I know that God is aware of my preference for the test results. I affirm and I think only of having perfect health. I also am surrendered to His will, asking that all be accomplished for the higher Good of all. For me this is the larger purpose in life; the higher Good is more important than my own preference. Many times there is no difference between my preference and what is for the higher Good, but then sometimes there is. When there is a difference, I surrender to God’s wisdom.

So, in the waiting I feel I am God’s child, totally surrendered to His will. I also think only of perfect health; my body is filled through and through with His Light, all the cells shining in His perfection. No matter the results of this biopsy I will continue this thought of perfection, for it brings me into His Holy Presence in body, mind and Spirit.

I also behold that same Light in you, for it adds prayerful thought-energy to your perfection in Him. Not only is this thought of perfection best for your spiritual health, it also enacts the highest principle for superior physical health as well. In this way you use both surrender to God and your powerful will to lift you closer to God; enabling perfect health and giving you peaceful joy!

A Bridge to the Infinite

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Life throws so many experiences at us from unexpected directions. From the time we are little children and our world is full of adult knees to the time when we look in the mirror and wonder who that old person is who is staring back at us, it is a roller coaster ride of experiences.

What is this life all about? It is a question that makes us go deeper than just living on the surface. The quest for meaning can be the beginning of the greatest adventure in life—the search for God-realization.

In this venture into higher consciousness we are told to keep our minds on God as a means of purifying the mind and having direct perception of the Truth. What we find in doing so is that life rudely interrupts our best intentions for this practice. Earning a living, our social relationships, the desires of the body and distractions of the world, those thousands and thousands of big and little situations that draw the mind everywhere except to God. It seems that life itself conspires to stop our making real spiritual progress.

In part, the problem is that we imagine these distractions are not part of our practice; we would be so much better off if we could somehow just get rid of them. However, a little analysis reveals that these are not things that keep us from our path, they are the path itself. We have been conditioned to think of all these distractions as something different from God. They are not. In truth, they are God come to us in these various forms.

At last you come to terms with the fact that daily life, its distractions and its desires are really dynamic expressions of Divine Consciousness. When you have understood this you have found a key to understanding life in a new and transformative way. The life-energy and intelligence found in all life, even life that apparently runs contrary to elevated consciousness all comes from one original Source.

A way to reconnect to this universal vision in which all is God is to allow all input into your brain, all thoughts and all feelings, remind you of God. In your mind you create a bridge to God with each and every experience. For instance, a beautiful sunset reminds you of God; that is an easy one. Then you think of the food you eat as ingesting God; this is more unusual but you can work with it. Tougher categories come as sexual drives, an impulse to lie, fear creeping into your awareness, anger erupting; looked at properly all of these lower impulses can become bridges back to God. However, since these thoughts have taken you into the opposite direction of God in the past they represent an even bigger stretch for you in your practice.

By connecting a thought or feeling to God you break the spell of separation. For example, take the sensation of pain. It can definitely be a distraction; even the thought of having pain in the future can take the mind far from God-consciousness. You build a bridge to God by thinking of the life-energy that is in the pain impulse itself; that life-energy gives the electrical impulse its power to travel to your brain via nerve pathways. By connecting to the life-energy that is behind the pain impulse and affirming that the life-energy comes from God— you are directing your mind directly back to its ultimate Source, and as a result you feel greater strength, peace and an ability to weather any storm coming your way.

Another example: you are feeling a sexual drive that is drawing you away from God. You then sense the power of God as the energy behind the drive. This bridge to God you are making releases the purity of God, you realize how limiting the sex impulse is, how narrowly it focuses your mind and you suddenly feel a release from it and an expansive freedom. You can do the same with fear, anger, depression, the feeling of being overwhelmed; all situations can be bridged back to the Infinite thus connecting you to all the attributes of Spirit and freeing you from the limitations imposed by the separation from your higher Self.

Keeping your mind on God then becomes practical and is rooted in your day to day experience. It creates a magic touch when your lower impulses receive Grace and are transformed into something higher, better. This “Midas touch” does not make ordinary objects turn into metallic gold; rather ordinary experience is touched by transformative Spirit and becomes the gold of God-consciousness. Take heart, you are not left helpless against an onslaught of materialism; rather you have the means to connect with God in all circumstances and thus build a bridge to the Infinite.

Health Note: The result of my last CAT and PET scans found that there is a mass on my liver that is 2 cm by 2 cm. A biopsy will be performed on Thursday at 4 p.m. to determine the nature of the mass. The time required for the procedure will be 1 hour, and I will be in the hospital for a total of five hours, including prep time beforehand and observation afterward.

I deeply appreciate all the prayers, long distance Reiki, and suggestions for optimizing health you have so lovingly given me. I continue with the program the oncological Naturopath has prescribed, both for food and supplements. I have also received two of the six injections for the vaccine that has been made with my own body cells. I will continue to give you updates as I know more. It is likely, based on past experience, that the biopsy results will be known sometime next week.

 

 

Enlightened Self-Interest

Mother Hamilton & St. Teresa of Calcutta

Mother Hamilton & Saint Teresa of Calcutta: Two great servants of God

Normally our interests lie very close to home; we are mostly interested in what will satisfy our senses and the ego. Through evolution of consciousness we grow to want what is best for our family, a circle of friends, perhaps our hometown and even our country. Through this enlarging circle we can see the gradual expansion of interest, heart and spirit.

Entering into a spiritual understanding of life makes you know there is no part of life that is not connected to the whole, or to yourself.  Compassion arises in the soul in which the interest of another becomes important to you. It may be the suffering of a child, an animal, or a group of people that is not a normal member of your circle of association. You find yourself sacrificing for others without thought of reward for yourself; just as saints around the world have spent themselves in such service to humanity.

However, one can be of service to others from two vastly different motivations. Initially service can be for the aggrandizement of the ego, “Look what I have sacrificed for others, no, I mean it–look at what I have done for others.” Or, sacrifice and service is driven by what is satisfying to God, not motivated by what others think.

We may be misled by the word sacrifice, thinking there is no satisfaction in it and that we must simply suffer. This notion comes from the mental conditioning of the ego. In reality, in harmonizing your life with God there is a transfer from self-interest, which creates suffering, to an enlightened Self-interest, which brings systemic harmony and joy of service.

Ordinary self-interest is driven by the needs of the body and the ego-mind. It can be the narrow self-interest of a child in order to satisfy his or her needs for food, warmth, comfort and the developing needs of an ego. Ordinary self-interest can also be the more intricate calculations for gaining wealth, power and prestige in the world; always the needs are driven by the body and the ego-mind.

Enlightened Self-interest comes from a wider identification with creation; seeing the world through the mind of the Creator. Looking out upon the world there is no perceived difference between the happiness of others and yourself. True Self-interest is not calculated for doing some good, rather  it is a spontaneous response to the collective needs of creation that springs from an intuitive understanding of the Creator’s will.

Real Self-interest is not attached to outcomes, it does not care who sees or does not see, and it feels spontaneous joy in performing the activity itself. True Self-interest gives joy to the giver as well as the receiver. There is no “martyrdom complex” in which the giver must suffer alone, rather giving is an expression of Divine will and therefore brings total freedom to the servant of God.

In God-consciousness all mankind and all creation are part of you, and you feel joy at the physical, mental and spiritual progress of creation. You also feel pain at the suffering and mistakes for those who are none other than your Self. God’s compassion flows through you and you feel the all-encompassing Divine Comforter inter-mixed with tender, even painful compassion for others.

The Divine Presence in you now naturally radiates out of you to uplift and heal creation of its suffering. We all broadcast what we experience in life to those whom our lives touch. Being in tune with the Divine Presence increases the power of what you transmit; bringing solace, beauty and purity to this world. God uses you to broadcast His love and compassion to all creation! There is truly nothing more useful or deeply meaningful for you than to lead a life of true Self-interest.

Aspiration vs Attachment

 

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Picture: Seeing God in Everything

Moods are a bane to your spiritual life. They are caused by attachment; life is not going the way you think it should. This thought authors an emotion, and oftentimes this feeling is a well-worn track; like a rut on the road that draws an unwary traveler into a direction that gets you stuck.

Moods can be of two types, a rajasic mood in which anger comes in cutting thoughts and sharp words, slashing your way through the day. The other type is tamasic, a depressive mood that hangs around you like a dark cloud allowing no light to penetrate. Either or both of these moods can dominate the mind and bring the sadhaka to a dead end.

While having a reaction to life’s events can happen in a blink of an eye, and the body and mind can have momentary shock, there is a time limit when that reaction will simply dissipate. Then there are those times when you nurse a feeling, adding new energy for diverse purposes that will extend those feelings and  create a mood.

You may have an expectation that life should be different: easier, more prosperous, smoother relationships, healthier, kinder, etc. It is not that these are not perfectly good aspirations to have in life, but to be attached to these aspirations creates a mood; hanging on to that mood brings you down, undoubtedly bringing others down as well.

Master said that Sri Yukteswar warned him about becoming moody and having an unregulated life. Perhaps these are connected, moods being a result of unregulated thinking. We generally think of moods being an emotion, yet it originates in the reasoning mind, as we first entertain an idea of how life should be versus how it is.

Using jnana, discrimination, you surgically remove or cancel the expectation that life should be different. This does not mean you do not aspire for something better, however, you cut out the expectation. Do you see the difference? For that difference is crucial. Expectation is attachment, aspiration ties into your creativity. Attachment binds you to this world, aspiration lifts you up, and when done properly unites you with higher consciousness.

It is compassion that wants a better world. You see the suffering in this world and aspire for healing: holiness, happiness and health for one and for all. A prayerful state of mind makes you look out to the world from the eyes of God; divine energy flows out from your heart in a compassionate living river. You then feel prompted into action to alleviate the suffering of another. Part and parcel to this attitude is the peaceful joy that flows throughout your being.

In contrast, when you have an attachment to the idea that this world should be better; should just work better, be more equal, just, etc., that attachment will make you feel angry or depressed when you see the poor state this world is in. Anger prompts cutting words left right and center for the villains, or you withdraw from this world into a dark mood. Neither of these responses connect you with higher consciousness, rather it creates doubt in there being anything higher than the suffering you see.

In both of these examples the world is exactly the same, however aspiration is freeing, attachment binds you. You must be a careful guardian of your thoughts and feelings in order to have true freedom. While a dark thought or feeling can erupt in a micro-second, it is likely that there has been a build-up period coming for sometime; a preceding lack of intensity in your sadhana. Constant remembrance of God frees you, forgetfulness binds you. It is a simple formula, and it determines your taking the higher road to true, lasting happiness.

 

Building a Perfect House in God

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Picture: In front of the Taj Mahal; a most perfect building

It is springtime and there is a building boom going on in our neighborhood. Not only is Jerry and Lois’ house coming to completion, but there are four other houses being built nearby. Other than design differences, there are noticeable distinctions in the quality of materials and craftsmanship in each one. Our mail lady is a self-appointed evaluator of such quality; saying Jerry and Lois’ home is very high quality, unlike their neighbors! Ram’s fun.

Whatever part you play in life there are principles of high quality work that will have vastly different results depending on the work ethic you put into it. Whether you are an accountant, a builder of homes, a clerk in a store, a raiser of children, whatever it is, quality definitely counts. And many times the distinctions are not that noticeable on the outside, but the outcome over time will tell a very different tale.

Oftentimes one will put effort into one part of life, but ignore the qualities in other parts. This imbalance will show increasing results as time goes on. One may want the latest and greatest television or camera, but go into debt to get it; ignoring their financial health in order to have their passion fulfilled. One may eat only organic natural foods, and smoke cigarettes or marijuana; ignoring the risks and obvious filth that comes with inhaling smoke.

To have a balanced life we must to have high quality living in all its aspects. We may have a very good professional life, but ignore or take for granted home life. We have all had at least some experience at what quality is like. When you handle some fabric that has exquisite craftsmanship, or you closely observe a beautiful flower, or listen to enchanting music you do not need anyone to explain to you its fineness; you simply know it.

Thinking about applying the principle of quality to all aspects of life you can immediately identify when it is present, and when it is absent. Refining your intuitional sense, the uplifting characteristics are felt deep down. It may be when you meet someone, see a building or observe a magnificent landscape, it resonates in you at your solar plexus; peaceful, uplifting and expansive.

Your spiritual practice at once stands alone, and it is also connected with every part of living; it is at the center of your life when you put God first. Spending quality time with God (you know when you have and you know when you have not) emanates out to all other activities. The feelings of upliftment, peace, love and joy permeate your entire day, both changing its quality, because of the state of being you are in, and attuning you to bringing in more of its highest vibration, by the choices you make.

Look to the highest quality in every part of your life. You are building a perfect house in God every day of your life. The materials you choose and the care with which you build both increases your satisfaction today, and will make a vast difference in your life and the lives of all those you touch as time unfolds. Create with the uplifting quality of God in all you do and experience the difference.

 

 

 

All is He

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Picture: Surrounded by Saints–Swami Satchidananda and Swami Chidananda of Divine Life Society–Anandashram January 1999

Papa says chanting Ram Nam is sweet, like candy in the mouth. In fact no words can describe the Bliss felt when chanting God’s holy Name. You may say that God has no name that can be spoken with the human tongue, and it is also true that every name is His name. However, there are certain names of God— in all languages—that have been surcharged through sacred repetition that has lifted up saints into the highest Consciousness; like a trail that has been blazed through the wilderness by thousands of years and thousands of feet that wear even sharp stones to smoothness. Ram Nam auspiciously qualifies as one of the most ancient and well used of such incantations.

It is God-experience alone that is the true Name of God: seeing the sacred Light, hearing the soaring AUM or AMEN, feeling the uplifting currents in the spine and brain, and expanding into infinite Spirit. Like a symphony orchestra, God can be the power of a violent storm or the sweetest touch of a spring breeze upon soft petals; God-experience encompasses all experience, and is far far beyond ordinary perception.

When I was a truck driver I drove mile after mile chanting the holy Name of Ram Nam. God lifted me up; my eyes partially closed leaving only enough consciousness in the world to operate the truck. Sometimes He completely closed my eyes and took me up into pure Spirit with a rush of Bliss and Power in the spine; then, of course, I had to pull over and park on the side of the road!

It took time and many many experiences but gradually the blockages were removed, so that now there is only the pure flow up the spine, the Name of God as AUM resounds all around, God’s thoughts flows through my own, His Love animates my heart, and His life-force walks and talks through this form. Far from creating ego this experience makes me absolutely know that of myself I am nothing; truly nothing. It is He, it is He, it is all He! Where is there room for ego when that is the case?

Oh what a love-affair God has created. He makes us journey far away from Him in consciousness. Then, He draws us back to Himself; creating magnetism when the time is right that we cannot, and do not want to resist. In this moment it is He who writes these words, and it is He who reads them, and it is He who charges them with His uplifting power to draw those He has chosen to Himself. What a wonderful play He has enacted!

When there is nothing but He, what is there to fear? If He wants a certain thing to happen, nothing can stop it. If He wants something not to happen, nothing can make it so. Our trying to go it alone is His trial in ignorance; our surrender to Him is His movement in time and space that purifies creation. Our part is to witness what He does within and all about us.

It may be that these words make no sense to you, and that is His will. It may be that you feel He is speaking these very words directly to, and through you, and that is His will as well. Many times I hear or see the words of a great Master, such as Mother, Master or Papa and I feel that the words spoken are my very own; for He makes me feel that kind of intimacy with these wonderful human expressions of Himself.

Now, He tells me, it is time to wake up; it is time for you to wake up! To feel God weaving Himself through every experience you have in life and to know that it is He alone who exists; One without a second. Why should you suffer separation for one moment longer? There is no reason. He is calling you with His divine magnetism, for it is He, it is He, it is all He; there is nothing else. So, be that! It can all start with chanting His holy Name: Om Sri Ram Jai Ram Jai Jai Ram; victory to God, victory to the Light.

Kriya Initiation

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Picture: Mother Hamilton 1974 Kriya Initiation

Kriya Yoga Initiation is a blessed and remarkable occurrence.  Every religion across the globe has initiation rites, each one designed to impart spiritual power and transformation. In yoga tradition the teacher, or guru, is held in high esteem and unlike some religious movements you are not simply joining an organization or movement but forming a sacred bond with a living master.

This past week’s Kriya Initiation brought to mind my Initiation from Mother Hamilton. I met Mother in March of 1974, soon after my twentieth birthday. After an intense search for a living teacher I found Mother in ways, that on the outside could seem accidental, through a friend of a friend, but now I understand the pull of the guru differently. Mother was not what I was expecting; I was thinking more along the lines of a wizened Indian man, grey beard and long hair if I had to put an image to it. In fact I had met such venerable looking gurus, but I did not feel the connection I was looking for. Although Mother was not the image I had in mind, she was more of a towering spiritual figure than I ever thought possible.

Mother gave Kriya Initiation that following June and I felt privileged and honored to be among the new initiates. Unknown to me at the time Mother had not given Kriya Initiation for the previous seven years. What eager anticipation I had as I arrived early; I had planned to meditate across the street from the chapel where we were to meet on the beautiful University of Washington campus. It was a very warm and perfect June day.

As I pulled up to the Chapel another car pulled in behind mine. It was none other than Mother and a devotee, much to my surprise. I offered to help; I brought items into the Chapel and helped set things up. I was allowed to help to a certain point, and then Mother asked me to leave. Afterward I sat under the blooming trees on the campus and I felt the beauty of the day.

I joined some devotees sitting in the waiting room meditating, and then the number of devotee-bees quickly grew. I wondered as to what was going to happen during initiation. I knew nothing about initiations, other than I very much wanted to be there. Toward the end of this most amazing ceremony Mother blessed me with a powerful touch at the ajna, at the point between the eyebrows. Later she asked me what I thought about Kriya, and since all the instructions were oral only and I had been anxious that I would be able to remember them all, I said in relief that it was simpler than I had feared. She instantly rejoined, “Just wait.” Of course she was perfectly right!

The next morning I vividly remember spreading my woolen blanket on the ground, facing east as the sun slowly revealed itself over the horizon announcing a new day. Indeed it was a new day! I felt such peace and contentment in practicing this remarkable method for Self-realization, from such an ancient tradition and handed down to us through this most amazing guru-lineage. The breath flowed along with the life-current; I was so happy at last to be absorbed in this sacred technique.

It is a mystery how Mother called me to her. It is a mystery how someone such as I with an ordinary Western background should respond to Eastern teachings that also embody Christianity and the essence of all religious practice. All of it is a great and wonderful mystery. I look back on that moment of Kriya Initiation over forty years ago with incredible gratitude for the gift Mother gave to me. I more fully realize now that my Initiation came at a great price to Mother, in a way that I did not know at the time. My gratitude, my understanding, and my love have only grown with time; forever they shine brightly like the sun growing and growing in the new morning’s light.

 

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