We celebrate the end of a year and the beginning of a new one. We can use this as an opportunity to take stock for what is working in our lives, and what it not. There is a simple psychological maxim, “When you find something that works for you, do more of that!” And obviously its opposite, “When something doesn’t work, do less of it! Reflection and analysis are essential to creating better models of what works, and this is a good time for doing both.

It is also a time for celebrating what has worked–what we have done well. Many of us do not take time to feel good about what we have accomplished–so often we are focused on our mistakes. The gives too much weight to the negative. While reflection is good, it should be done with the idea of learning from our experience. Obsessing on the negative only gives wrongheaded patterns power. Learn from your experiences, make amends where possible, and move on in a positive way. Do not make a fetish of focusing on wrong actions, and learn to feel good about what you have done well—then do more of that!

Looking forward to the future, do not project a bad year onto the new one. You have a blank canvas upon which to paint, an empty book with fresh pages to write upon. Sri Yukteswarji said that God creates this universe; he did not say God created, but God creates. You are co-creating your life with God. You are in a constant state of becoming, and each moment holds the potential for all eternity in it.

Sense this potential of the moment–God is in you, and you are in God. With that awareness a vast field of potential comes alive in you, so do not sell yourself short. Feel that God is coming alive in you and that you do not know all that you can be. So, each day is a discovery for what God wants for you. It is an exciting time to be alive, no matter your circumstances, because you are truly made in the likeness and image of God. A very happy New Year to you!

Health Update: On Friday I had an examination by my dermatologist and on Saturday I had a CT scan and an MRI (no PET scan is scheduled from here on out, and I have been extended to six month checkups from the previous four month exams). Today I received my results online from My Chart. All scans were normal showing no problems. This December marks three years since I was first diagnosed and had a small intestine resection. April will be three years since the liver resection and since that time there has been only clear scans and my health has been excellent. The dermatologist did burn off a suspicious something on the skin and sent it in for a biopsy, which he said did not concern him. So, good news for a great new year!  

We would have to travel back one hundred and fourteen years to Christmas day in Duluth Minnesota. I am sure it was cold, below freezing on this special holy day. The mother, a beautiful woman, fully expectant, but there must have been anxiety as this was the only successful delivery; with six others who died at birth. Her father, half Iroquois, would have looked on with silent reserve. The young family did not have much money, so the circumstances would have been very modest. At that time the birth may have been at home, as many were then.

Mother was born around noon that day; as she said, she ruined her mother’s Christmas dinner. Her life was to be terribly difficult, but also filled with overcoming and tremendous achievement. She had the love and grace of two fully realized masters in her life, and the love and recognition of many, many saints of high realization. She lived a full life: a professional woman, a mother of three, with grandchildren and great grand children (who called her G.G., great grandmother), and most importantly, she was a tremendous God-woman—a teacher and guide, a guru for many.

When she walked in the room you felt the power of God in her. She also had a lively interest in everyone she met. She always sought to bring out the best in everyone and give them fully of God’s love. With practical wisdom and intuitive insight she guided many on the path of realization. She sowed seeds of the highest quality for spiritual growth and realization. Some seeds landed on stony indifference, some entered good ground, but too shallow, some found rich earth but the storms of life eventually eroded the base and those trees did not bear the fullest fruit, and then a very few cultivated the seed that was freely given into producing the most perfect fruit in God’s garden.

Today we honor Mother. Her birth into this world was a challenge from the start, but she made the most of what she was given, and as a result we have untold opportunities as part of our rich inheritance she bequeathed us. As she said, If I, just this one small woman can do it, so can you! Mother unleashed the greatest potential in a human being and attained the highest realization of God—Sahaja Samadhi.

On this Christmas Day we celebrate the advent of two Christ-souls, Jesus and Mother. Both came for the sake of humanity. Both came to awaken the sleeping God within us. Both left footsteps for us to follow so that we too may fully know: I feel the wonder and the beauty of Thy glorious Presence in every part of my being. My heart is bursting with my love for Thee. My mind and my intelligence are radiant with Thy healing Light. I and my Father are One, blessed Spirit, I am He!

Be it so. Merry Christmas to all, and Happy Birthday Jesus and Mother!

Stories are such wonderful teachers. The story that has grown up around the birth of Jesus—an avatar come for the salvation of this world—is captivating and makes one feel intimate with that holy family.

We think of a star studded night, the shepherds are having an extraordinary vision of angels, a promise fulfilled from ancient times; a night of wonder and glory (Luke 2). So inspired are they that the flocks are left and a search is made for the fulfillment of the angels’ prediction—to find a babe wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger. What a charming sight it brings to mind to think of shepherds in rough woolens and simply shod coming in reverence and awe due to the angels’ appearance and what was said. We know those blessed shepherds are uplifted by this experience because we are told they return to their fields glorifying and praising God.

We then jump from Luke’s account to Matthew’s (Matt 2); for each have their part to tell. We imagine wise men (astrologers reading the stars) approaching a “young child,” (a young child—perhaps not a newborn—but let us stay with how tradition comes down to us today), and on that fateful night they open their treasures of gold, frankincense and myrrh. Gifts that are of such great value that history has thought of these men as kings.

So, the scene is set for our deepened meditation. We see the angels imparting their prophetic message with spiritual power to humble shepherds in their fields, and we too experience the glory of this night, the ecstatic beauty of it all. We follow the shepherds as they proceed to a humble cowshed and shyly approach in wonder, this newborn and his parents—we bow with the shepherds at the feet of this holy baby who has come to fulfill ancient prophecies.

Then, on their heels we see ourselves enter in with the wise men; bringing all that is treasured in life; in blissful submission we surrender our lives and all that we are at Divinity’s feet. There is magic in the air, strange and marvelous things are afoot. We merge into the story through our deepened meditation: Divinity is born in man; Sacredness is awakened in you. What greater promise than that is to be fulfilled?

Oh, what peace, what joy and bliss is ours! How our souls thrill at the prospect of being in such holy company. What better than to let our minds dwell on this holy night in deepened meditation? May peace ring out from the inner depths of your humble soul, and may the promise of a divine child be born in you, bringing to life all of its fulfillment—for you and for all mankind.

There are many mediums that have been used to lift up consciousness: art, architecture, poetry, but none is more powerful than music. Last night we gathered and sang Christmas songs, and what a lovely feeling there continues to be from the power of song focused on the sacredness of life.

Once God gave me a vision in which I saw the angels gathered about God’s throne as song filled the air. I had never really been attracted by descriptions of this before; I did not understand the appeal of sitting on a cloud strumming a harp. Mother once quoted Master saying that this idea did not appeal to him either, he said, “My God, how boring!” And that is how I felt about it. However, in this vision, how do I describe it, the angelic music was definitely music, but also variations of bliss. And those angelic souls were like meditating yogis, enraptured with the ever-new bliss that also manifested as music. It was so unusual, and absolutely magnificent. How I wish everyone could sit at the throne and experience the power, the unbelievable beauty and the always fresh and pure feeling of it.

Songs to God here on earth are expressions of this same principle. There are so many truly lovely Christmas songs, and it makes it special that, like the yearly ritual of putting up the Christmas tree and excavating for those treasured ornaments and decorations, it makes it special to keep those songs only for this time of year. And, like those angels about God’s throne, songs to God can be holy, filled with varying vibrations of infinite bliss. And this is what I continue to feel this morning.

Bliss is a most interesting phenomenon. It is always identifiable as bliss, a common signature that you know it when you experience it. Yet, within that unity it is constantly changing, ever-new. All the world looks for what is new out there, throwing away things of the past and focusing on the latest and greatest. Yet, residing right in our own beings is this tremendous source of power, light and ever-enthralling bliss. The name of God in India is Sat-Chid-Ananda, and the last, Ananda, means Bliss. It is one of the eternal verities of the Infinite.

This world is full of divisions. However, underlying all divisions there beats the unifying rhythm of bliss that ties everything together in perfect harmony. Certainly this world is here for us to enjoy, and part of that enjoyment is the variety of variegated expression. To bring all of these multifaceted creations under one roof requires a universal principle, and that is the presence of God that weaves a musical theme of bliss throughout all creation. So, during this season when we sing out the promise, “Glory to God in the highest, on earth peace, and good will toward men,” (Luke 2:14) let us find the bliss within that makes this promise a reality—even now, even now.    

Christmas traditions do make it “A Most Wonderful Time of the Year,” as the song proclaims. For our Northern Hemisphere, and as we climb in latitude the prolonged dark days make decorative light displays inside and outside of the house have additional meaning and beauty. Seasonal music, foods, the exchange of cards and greetings and get-togethers all make for a festive spirit. Of course, most of the wide world does not celebrate Christmas, but, what is universal to all are subtle powerful currents that occur with the seasonal solstice.

For millennia yogis and mystics from every nook and clime of the world have recognized the subtle but powerful effects of different times of the day, the year and movements of the zodiacal clock. I have never made a study of astrology, but I have had experiences with some of these dynamics. On a few occasions I consulted an astrologer who Mother had also gone to see. One such time was when I had injured my back at work and it became clear over the months that I could no longer perform the hard physical labor of my current job. I had inwardly felt prompted to pursue a degree in psychology, but I was concerned because it would initially mean going back for a university degree and, at least for a while, making less money than I had been—I was concurrently responsible for providing for a family. With that in mind I went to see this astrologer with an open mind, but some skepticism. I had only provided my birth information to her when I sat down for a “reading.”

She proceeded to tell me that I had recently injured my back (there was nothing obvious in my physical movements that would have told her that), and that if I continued in my current work I would be crippled, a lack of fluid moving in the spine. Later I asked my doctor about this and he said that would be a very likely result. She also said that I should be a teacher or a counselor, and that at first the money would be less, but eventually it would be alright—all of which turned out to be true. She touched on many other aspects of my life, but this was the salient point for that visit. It proved to me that there was something to astrology; her accuracy and specificity were remarkable. She did get the time off a bit when she said, “You recently hurt your back, six months ago.” It had been only three months before, not six.

Other experiences with solar and lunar influences have included an awareness of the full moon effect. I have an increase of energy during full moon cycles. This, by the way, is always a positive influence; waking up earlier in the morning and keeping me up later at night to meditate—the energy provides a spiritual uplift. And when the earth makes its way around the sun and we approach Winter Solstice I am aware of powerful forces at work. For many years this had stirred up difficult psychological thoughts and moods. At some point—some years ago now—those difficult moods left, and now I only experience these forces as uplifting currents. A third area I have been aware of is the sense that when either events proceed with extraordinary smoothness, like all the skids are greased, or it is like fighting uphill all the way, it is as if the stars have taken on a helpful or a difficult turn. There are those times when what was difficult suddenly changes, like a magnet flipping its polar ends, and what was repelling before is now easy. There may be other explanations for this experience, but I have a sense that the stars certainly seem to figure into these shifting winds.

One of the principles that yogis discovered is that you can take full advantage of these recurring cycles. For instance, with the Winter Solstice you can deepen your meditation, spread your wings so to speak to take advantage of these uplifting currents. And while these active solstice forces may stir up difficult psycho-emotional energies as well, it then makes this is a time for purification and it is your spiritual work to pass these subconscious moods into the Light. It is valuable to be aware of these invisible, but powerful forces and use them to your advantage.

So, even as you are enjoying the hustle and bustle demands of the season and there are many lovely traditions to take advantage of, as a householder-yogi you should also be cognizant of these subtly powerful currents as you approach the Winter Solstice. Take time to read sacred texts and meditate deeply. Take inspiration from these magnificent words from a wonderful God-man, Isaiah (Isaiah 40)), from nearly 3,000 years ago:

²⁵ To whom then will ye liken me, or shall I be equal? saith the Holy One.

²⁶ Lift up your eyes on high, and behold who hath created these things….

²⁸ Hast thou not known? hast thou not heard, that the everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, fainteth not, neither is weary? there is no searching of his understanding.

²⁹ He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength.

³⁰ Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall:

³¹ But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

When it comes to your search for God it can be one thing to say that you surrender to Him, quite another to truly let it all go and lay everything at His feet. It is common to hear someone complain to God, “I don’t like this, and I don’t like that!” But complaining is not surrender, rather it is often the very essence of attachment—an ongoing negotiation with God about what is not right with the world and how it should be different.     

In a seeming contrast to surrender, Sri Yukteswarji, then through Master and Mother, very clearly knew that the most powerful way to invoke the creative power of God was not to go to him as a beggar, “Oh Lord, I am a most miserable sinner, and while I do not deserve this, will you give me____. Rather, the Master thought only of going to God as a rightful heir, each claiming his or her lawful inheritance, “Lord, I am made in Your likeness and image. I now claim my natural state of abundance, perfect health, and total realization.”

What do these two approaches have in common? In both, total surrender and through prayer-demand, you know that you are not outside the window looking into the banquet of God, rather you are at the table of the Infinite as one of the sacred family. In both, God is not some distant personality to whom you beg a few crumbs or to stand in abject misery of separation—rather, right attitude heals the breach, you merge your little self with God’s great Self.

This is the measurement by which you may know that you have perfectly surrendered or that you have attained the right state of mind in prayer-demand—you feel deeply connected with the omnipresent, omniscient and omnipotent Spirit in and around you. You may work to achieve these states by practicing surrender and affirming prayer-demands, but there is a qualitative shift that occurs when you quit being on the outside and you find yourself a full member at God’s table. 

There was the night Mother Mary was visited by an angel, telling her she would bear a child, a holy child. There must have been so many thoughts that came into her mind. First, how was such a thing possible since she had never been with a man? Then, there were very real consequences: the shame of being pregnant and not being married, the dire law and she could be shunned by her family, rejected by her fiancé, even stoned to death! With all this hanging over her head she surrendered to God’s will: “And Mary said, Behold the handmaid of the Lord; be it unto me according to thy word. And the angel departed from her.” (Luke 1:38)

Such perfect surrender gives peace, inner assurance and strength. It does not mean that everything is going to go perfectly smoothly. As it is told, the birth of Jesus is filled with horror as soldiers are sent to kill the infant, and the little family has to flee to the distant country of Egypt to save their lives. However, inner direction led them to safety, it also took them home when the time was right, and it sustained them with strength and needed abundance throughout it all.  

Whether claiming your right as a lawful recipient of all that is God’s or being in complete surrender to His will, let your heart be at peace; feel the Divine Presence full to overflowing within and without. The life of Jesus is replete with examples of manifesting God’s will for healing and abundance, and also accepting what is, in total surrender to the Supreme One’s will—each according to its own season. May this sacred time of celebrating the birth of Christ-consciousness into the world and into the human frame strengthen your resolve to be in seamless union with the ever-perfect Light of your Heavenly Father and Divine Mother.

It is a mysterious life God has given me. Mysterious in the sense of being inscrutable, unpredictable, full of power and glory that is beyond description, and dependent upon a Divine Will that puts some things in the scrap heap, and then suddenly propels other things forward without hesitation.

Mother tells a wonderful story of the time there was a disciple of Papa’s who wanted to go with him when God directed Ramdas to go somewhere. The disciple had heard and read Papa’s accounts of his travels and was probably thinking they would be on some marvelous adventure. Well, one day Papa said that Ram was directing Ramdas to walk across a field—so the disciple joined Papa in high anticipation. When Papa got half way across the field he simply turned around and started to walk back to the Ashram. The stunned disciple asked what they were doing, why had they turned around? Papa said that Ram had suddenly directed him to turn around, so he did. Such was Papa’s total surrender to God.

And so, I find it to be so in my life. As I look back, it has been a life of discipleship now for many years. Decades of powerful forces that Mother unleashed in this form, many years of His power and glory intermingling their influences into my life—governing and shepherding and gradually transforming the body, mind and soul into a living manifestation of His Light.

It has been years of testing, as oppositional forces of desire nature, fear and obstinance fought for control of this form. Though I made uncountable mistakes, somehow God and Guru never let go of me, though I let go of them. Due to this grace I learned, changed and became something new, yet it is a state of consciousness that is deeply familiar—as if it has always been true, always been me. My old life is now seen as something long ago; it is as if I have lived many lives in this one lifespan, some of them almost unrecognizable as being me.

Yesterday God kept me wrapped in His power, I barely moved more than a few feet all through the day. Incredible forces move through this form of such magnitude that if they had come in this strength years ago it would have completely overwhelmed this system. There is no doubt that it is the Divine One controlling it all, and a few times I needed to remind Him that the elephant in the hut need only move a little and the whole hut will collapse! As it is, the hut shudders from these inner fountains of light and glory.

He lets me do one thing, and not another. It reminds me of the saying from Exodus speaking of focusing the mind on things other than the Divine Presence, “Though shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the Lord thy God am a jealous God.” [Exodus 20:5] Of course this does not mean that God is jealous as in a human kind of jealousy—rather, it is a matter of inner attunement. The world may want one thing from you, but God is going in a different direction. On a human level you may think that you should be doing one thing, going across the field and beyond, and God wants another, for you to turn around after going half-way. To be fully attuned to God you must be willing to go against this world, even go against what you humanly think are your obligations.

There was a Methodist minister/missionary who was staying at Anandashram when Mother was there. He was inspired by Papa and very intensely wanted his God-realization. As Mother said, “One evening—I must tell you an interesting story about this—he decided that he would go to an old temple ruin up on top of Snake Hill. And he was going to stay there and meditate until he got God-realization, because he had been filled with bliss as he sat at the feet of the Swami. And so without telling anyone but me, and night came and they couldn’t find him anyplace. So Papa started worrying about him and he sent some of the boys out to see if they could find him. And they searched everywhere and they couldn’t find him and Papa became quite concerned. And he said to me, “Do you know where he is?” I said, “Yes, I do, Papa, but he asked me not to tell.” And he said, “Is he at the ruin at the top of the hill?” And I said, “Well, it could be.” So finally he sent the boys up there but Paul didn’t want to come down, he was going to stay. And they went back two or three times, finally he condescended to come down. And he said, “I only came because Papa, being my guru, sent for me.” And Papa made the statement that, “Sometimes the Guru tells you something outwardly to test you, but inside, he is hoping that you will make the other decision.”

What Mother calls “Snake Hill” is probably Manjapati, the hill behind Anandashram. There were many nights I made my way up the hill to meditate under the full moon. I was warned a few times not to do so, due to the fact there were venomous snakes living on the hill. One day at the Ashram a small snake was discovered that caused a lot of excitement; it was only about six inches long and it is one of the most venomous snakes in the world! I saw how easy it would be to stumble across one of these going up the hill, especially in the dark. Even though I was told not to venture up the hill in the dark, I felt it was Papa directing me climb up with the moon as my torch. If it was his will that I should die in doing so, then so be it (what better way to go than following God’s will!).

And surely, this is true for all life—to be in His all-powerful grip and acting according to His will is to live as God truly meant for His disciples to live. So, there are emails I have read but not responded to, there are projects needing attention but left to languish in the moment, there are friends and loved ones (that if I were responding my own human desires) I would make sure I called or wrote, but that too goes unattended. I leave all in His hands, I have the freedom to be imprisoned in His will, and there is nothing I would rather do, nowhere else I would rather be.

In this moment, I am looking out on desert hills and desert expanse, and it is here He wants me, and it is here that I am to fulfill His will. I am steeped in His Presence, His power, glory, bliss, and the Light of His Being. Oh, what a mysterious life He has given me.